The day following my birthday was also a good day. My 8th grade girls made me a cake and surprised me at recess and I have to say thats pretty cool.
Also a Dale update: Dale left this morning and made the decision to leave yesterday so happy birthday to me again. I have to say while I am thrilled that he's gone I think some of the students are a little sad he didn't even say good-bye to them and my guess is a lot of the good stuff he's done with his students will be lost because I think some respect has been lost in him not seeing this thing through. He was basically looking for an excuse to leave and when Mr. Cesar, the PE Teacher who Dale hates, had to move into the house with him and David he found his excuse. So Adios to Mr. Dale
Anyways moving on. Today I went to the mini-supermarcado and I came out and saw a little boy asking for limperas and I just shrugged moving on. These kids are everywhere but this kid looked sad and as I thought about the 3 limperas I had in my pocket I thought, "what the hell do I really need these for," and I walked back and gave them to him. But what did I do for him really? I gave him 3 lems whoo hoo that'll buy you a bunch of nothing. Even if I emptied out my wallet and gave him everything what will that do really? It might feed him a few days more but when the money runs out, then what?
It makes me so sad to see these people and the lack of hope these people have. There's no improving their situation and I wonder what am I really doing for Honduras or for anyone? I came here to teach kids but I know ultimately I'm gaining more from the experience than they are and besides these are kids who have parents that have money. These kids will do okay and a lot of them have never been exposed to some of the terrible poverty that exists here.
I think about this a lot as I get closer to going to Africa. What do I expect to really do there? Obviously I hope to educate people about health, help women learn more about contraceptives and how to plan families and provide as much nutrition as possible for their children. I hope to educate people about STD and AIDS prevention. But will I be effective and will it last?
If you think of the task of overcoming language and cultural barriers and being able to become accepted enough into a community that people will listen its as though they've sent an ant to move a boulder. How qualified am I? The answer is not a lot. I think the reality of it is, is the Peace Corps will do more for me than I will for the people in Africa. I'll get to learn a new language, see a new part of the world, experience a new culture. Then when its over I get to return to my comfortable American home with all my nice things with clean water and electricity and go on with my life. What enabled me to do this? Simple luck. I happened to be born in America and whats more I happened to be born a white girl with upper middle-class parents. While I have to give kudos to my parents for not spoiling me as much as they could have my life has been very priviledged. I'm coming out of college debt free and endless opportunities which is more than most people in the world have.
So while I hope to achieve good results in Africa and I plan to work as hard as possible Im not sure its as admirable as people think. My parents say, "I'm so proud of you", my friends think its great I'm doing this, people always tell me how great it is I'm giving up 2 years of my life to do this, and so many people talk about wishing they could do what I'm doing. But is it admirable? I'm not so sure. Maybe its the guilt of being born priviledged but I almost feel like I owe it to my fellow human beings to help better their situation. Call me a liberal hippy but America and the Western World has benefited from the chaos and underdevelopment of Africa and other countries. It allows us to produce goods cheaper and buy other raw materials at lower prices. Our lifestyle is maintained through the exploitation of others not as fortunate to be born in the Western World. We owe it to them to help and provide Aid and a system of sustainability.
And in the end what I'm doing is only a drop in the bucket. I dont expect to move mountains I just hope I can change the life of a few people, even just one. I hope that my time here has at least brought something positive forward. But my parents shouldn't be proud of me for it and my friends shouldn't tell me what I'm doing is great. In the end I think what I'm doing is trying in part to pay the bill, trying to give back what I owe because I was lucky enough to be born American and receive an education and have opportunities most people will never have. Unfortunately today all I had to give to a hungry kid was 3 lousy limperas.
5 comments:
dude... you're so a liberal hippy... I don't feel like I owe 2 years of my life because I was lucky to be born in america.. I think I'll just sit back and enjoy the free ride on the freedom train :p... just messin.. but seriously, it's not your obligation and it isn't your fault, you do your best and that's all you can do. Every little bit helps, that's what I've learned.
hey meghan this is jorge *9th grades rocks* / so my dad went today to pick up mt grades and it seems i got a 78 in literature! is that my grade or was there a mistake... did not now where else to tell you and we have classes until tuesday
p.d.* i had to go to the doctor so i missed reading with the 3rd graders..
Ok, since you don't seem to check your email.. I want you to at least write me on MY blog, which is koobinator.blogspot.com ok? thanks, love ya!
i know this may be hard to believe, but this could have been me writing the same thing but just 30+ years earlier. i really am proud of you and very grateful that you care about your fellow man enough to have the awareness you have as well as the will to actually do something about your convictions.
i love you, moo.
HI there.
I feel the same way quite often. In Texas there have been a lot of protests about immigration. I just think, "If I were them, I'd be swimming too. What makes me any better? Because I happened to be born 5 hours on this side of the border instead of 2 minites on the other side." Everyone deserves opportunity!
I think this is what life's about though.... making a difference. Using your unique talents to make the world a better place.
I've spent the last 10 years chasing that dream. It's only been within the past 4 that I can say I have accomplished it. Every day I look in the mirror and know that I helped someone (several people) who no one else could! I make a difference- A unique contribution to the world around me. Sure it's only one life at a time. BUT it sure matters to that one life!!!!
So many times, I have wanted to give up. My dreams bury me sometimes. But when I look back, I have made a HUGE difference. I taught a 4 year old boy who can't speak and can barely move to read. And by doing so, gave him communication, relationships, and a future.
I gave a man with ALS and another man with Parkinson's a way to communicate again after it had been taken away. I gave a physically impaired doctor a way to write his work. I'm teaching braille to a 20 year old young man who suddenly became blind 2 years ago.
But it's been a long road- so many times having people tell me that what I do isn't important. Your dreams are important! You CAN make a difference.
I guess my point is- many times- you will feel like you are banging your head up against the wall. But by just making a difference where you can--- you can make the world a better place--- at least for a few. And Those Few lives are worth all the effort.
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